Breastfeeding Challenges: Overcoming Others...
When I began to tell people that I was planning on breastfeeding Lucas, I received all sorts of reactions. Some people thought that I was doing the right thing, some people were neutral, and to my complete and utter surprise, the majority of people disapproved. I've always been the kind of person to take the opinions of others into consideration, but this was one thing that I wasn't going to budge on. I knew that breastfeeding was the best thing for Lucas, and I was hell-bent on doing it.
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Let me tell you, breastfeeding is NOT an easy thing to do, especially with so many people are opposed to it. I was actually told that I shouldn't breastfeed because it's unnatural, embarrassing, and indecent. It was the stance of some people (both men and women) that a mother should have more self respect than to have to "do that" in public
I have heard people (both in and out of our families) who disapproved of my nursing because neither Clinton or I were breastfed. A lot of people in our parents' generation were turned-off by breastfeeding because of the research that was announced way-back-then. Formula was on an incline, and it was much more convenient for moms (and dads, too!) to mix up some milk and powder than to be forever-tied to your baby. |
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One day, while nursing Lucas at the mall, a woman who appeared to be in her 80's walked past, and commented, "I don't know how young girls think they can do that in public! It's TERRIBLE!" She made sure that she spoke loudly enough for me to hear, and shot a dirty look in my direction. Within a couple minutes, a group of women walked by, some of which were around my age, and made similar comments, and shook their heads in disbelief. Immediately afterward, a group of high school-aged boys approached from the opposite direction, and began to outwardly laugh when they saw what I was doing. When I gave them a stern look for their behavior, one boy's response was, "Yer boobs are out!"
With all of these negative comments, you'd think that I was disrespectful about nursing in public! But as a matter of fact, it's the complete opposite. I use a nursing cover when I'm not at home, and always wear nursing tops, which together prevent anyone from seeing anything. |
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Deciding whether or not to breastfeed your baby is a personal choice. If you are comfortable doing it, and can take what others say with a grain of salt, then by all means!
Breastfeeding Challenges: Nursing in Public...
I have always been a shy person when it comes to exposing myself in public. High school Gym class was an absolute nightmare for me, because I had to change my clothes in front of people. I didn't even like wearing a swimsuit in public before I had Lucas. So when it came to breastfeeding, I was leery about nursing Lucas outside of our home. I dreaded the day when Lucas would do something crazy, and thus revealing "my girls" to everyone in the room, who would already have been staring at me in disgust. As it turned out, nursing in public wasn't that difficult.
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When I decided that I was going to nurse Lucas, Clinton and I signed up for a Breastfeeding class. It was a four-hour course offered by the same woman who taught our birthing classes, Peggy. She was a retired labor and delivery nurse, and mother of three, who had breastfed all of her children. (But more on that information later!) As part of the course, she showed us how to use a receiving blanket to cover your baby while nursing.
Peggy recommended to simply wrap your baby up in a blanket, placing part of it over your baby's head, so no one would know whether you were holding a sleeping infant, or nursing. She concluded that draping a blanket over your shoulder or using a nursing cover would cause attention to be drawn to you, and make it obvious what you were doing, thus causing more attention to be drawn to you. |
 "Over the Shoulder" Method |
I tried this method with Lucas several times with little to no success. He was a wiggly little thing, and kept pulling or kicking the blankets off. I tried practicing at home, thinking that maybe we would both get used to it, but all attempts failed miserably.
I was already getting dirty looks from strangers about my nursing in public, then I had the stress of worrying about being accidentally exposed, that I began pumping milk before each trip, and bringing a bottle of breast milk along. While it sounds great in theory, it gets REALLY old after a while. Then I started running into the problem that I had milk to give Lucas, but I will still producing! I would get extremely uncomfortable after about 2 or 3 hours, and then I was faced with the same conundrum - I had to nurse in public! So I decided that things had to change.
I was already getting dirty looks from strangers about my nursing in public, then I had the stress of worrying about being accidentally exposed, that I began pumping milk before each trip, and bringing a bottle of breast milk along. While it sounds great in theory, it gets REALLY old after a while. Then I started running into the problem that I had milk to give Lucas, but I will still producing! I would get extremely uncomfortable after about 2 or 3 hours, and then I was faced with the same conundrum - I had to nurse in public! So I decided that things had to change.
 Nursing Cover |
My sister-in-law, and pseudo lactation consultant, had just given birth to baby number five a couple weeks before I had my little revelation. I often went to her for advice while I was pregnant, and when I began nursing. I asked her what I should do, and she suggested purchasing a nursing cover. I said to her, "But Carmen, won't everyone know what I'm doing, then?" and she replied, "If you're covered up, do you really care if they know?"
And that's when it hit me... I was taking every possible measure to ensure that people didn't know I breastfed, when it was something that I should be proud of! Covering up was just a courtesy to those around me. So I purchased a nursing cover, figuring it was worth a try, despite what others had said about them. |
A nursing cover is essentially a big apron you wear while nursing. Most of them are made out of breathable, receiving blanket-type material with an adjustable strap at the top. Along the neckline of the cover, some brands sew boning between the layers of fabric, creating a stiff "bulge" so you can see your baby, and they can see you! Very handy if you have a baby who likes to look at you while they nurse.
I had been receiving offers via e-mail for free nursing covers from a site called Udder Covers. They sell fashionable nursing covers, and offer great discounts. You can Google coupon codes, and find one that will get you a good deal. Nursing covers are also available at Target for an affordable price, and at Babies R Us in more expensive, designer labels.
I now carry my nursing cover with me wherever we go, and it solved the problem of Lucas kicking off the blankets, and the anxiety I was experiencing while I nursed in public. I would highly suggest purchasing one, or ordering a free one online, and trying it out for yourself.
I had been receiving offers via e-mail for free nursing covers from a site called Udder Covers. They sell fashionable nursing covers, and offer great discounts. You can Google coupon codes, and find one that will get you a good deal. Nursing covers are also available at Target for an affordable price, and at Babies R Us in more expensive, designer labels.
I now carry my nursing cover with me wherever we go, and it solved the problem of Lucas kicking off the blankets, and the anxiety I was experiencing while I nursed in public. I would highly suggest purchasing one, or ordering a free one online, and trying it out for yourself.
Babies sleep in beds, not on Boobies!
The extent of my initial training in breastfeeding came from a nurse while I was hospital immediately following my recovery. On my third or fourth time feeding Lucas, a not-so-subtle lady in scrubs came next to my bed and rearranged the pillows and adjusted my arms, without even asking. After I gave her a funny look, she proceeded to explain that babies should be slightly uncomfortable while nursing, so they don't fall asleep. She told me, "Snuggling your little one is okay, but do what you can to keep them awake while they're eating." Babies find it very calming to be nestled in their mother's arms, sucking away at a delicious meal, but that also lends itself to short feedings, and thus, unhealthy weight loss.
This nurse's name was Helene, and she showed me how to massage Lucas' hands, feet, and back in a way that was not harmful, but aroused him from a milk-induced coma, and keep him focused on eating. Helene had four children of her own that were nursed, and she told me a story about how she loved to let her baby fall asleep in her arms, but that it leads to shorter feedings. She recommended removing the baby at the first signs of sleepiness, and either burp or talk to them. Interrupting a baby's meal can be an effective way to awaken them, and then continue feeding them a moment later.
This nurse's name was Helene, and she showed me how to massage Lucas' hands, feet, and back in a way that was not harmful, but aroused him from a milk-induced coma, and keep him focused on eating. Helene had four children of her own that were nursed, and she told me a story about how she loved to let her baby fall asleep in her arms, but that it leads to shorter feedings. She recommended removing the baby at the first signs of sleepiness, and either burp or talk to them. Interrupting a baby's meal can be an effective way to awaken them, and then continue feeding them a moment later.
Avoid Creating A Dependency on Being Nursed to Sleep
Allowing your baby to fall asleep nursing creates a routine out of this behavior. Before you know it, WHA-BAM! Your baby needs to be breastfeed to fall asleep. This can mean big trouble, as well as many sleepless nights for you and your little one.
I ran into this problem with Lucas when he was just a couple months old. After switching back to being nursed (from being bottle-fed breast milk), I loved having my special cuddle-time with my little man. I tried every single one of the techniques Helene showed me to keep him awake, but none of them worked! I finally had to just buck-it-up and bear it, and end Lucas' feedings a couple minutes short of him falling asleep in my arms, knowing it was for the best. Sometimes he cried, and other times he would burp and then go back to eating.
I won't say that it's easy doing this, but it's a heck of a lot easier than having a baby on your breast 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Plus, if you can limit the number of dependencies that you baby has, the better, stronger person he or she will be when they grow up. I'm all for routines and schedules, believe me. But creating a calming and supportive bedtime routine for your baby is much more beneficial than always and forever nursing them into a milk-induced coma.
I ran into this problem with Lucas when he was just a couple months old. After switching back to being nursed (from being bottle-fed breast milk), I loved having my special cuddle-time with my little man. I tried every single one of the techniques Helene showed me to keep him awake, but none of them worked! I finally had to just buck-it-up and bear it, and end Lucas' feedings a couple minutes short of him falling asleep in my arms, knowing it was for the best. Sometimes he cried, and other times he would burp and then go back to eating.
I won't say that it's easy doing this, but it's a heck of a lot easier than having a baby on your breast 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Plus, if you can limit the number of dependencies that you baby has, the better, stronger person he or she will be when they grow up. I'm all for routines and schedules, believe me. But creating a calming and supportive bedtime routine for your baby is much more beneficial than always and forever nursing them into a milk-induced coma.
